How to Change Your Marriage from Bitter to Better

Relationships are either getting better or getting worse. They don’t stay the same. You might say that a marriage is either getting better or bitter. If you examine the words “bitter” and “better,” you will notice that the only difference is that “bitter” has an “i” and “better” has an “e.”

When a marriage begins to drift into bitterness, one or both partners are acting selfishly. An easy way to remember how a marriage becomes bitter is by emphasizing that the “i” indicates a self-centered, “I focused” marriage. When your marriage starts to drift into a bitter place, choose to take the focus off of yourself and opt instead to honor God with all of your thoughts, words and actions. One partner can begin to effect change in a relationship by this one (all be it difficult) intentional action.

Just as the “i” in bitter reminds you of your self-focus, the “e” in the word better can serve as a reminder to choose instead to be God focused. Let the “e” remind you of Emmanuel. The Bible translates the word “Emmanuel” to mean “God with us” or “God-centered.”

To sum up, in order to have a successful marriage, you must have a life-long pursuit of a vital connection with Christ that continually guides you to respond selflessly towards your spouse in a loving Christ-like way. The cornerstones to a “better” marriage is having a Christ-centered intentional marriage.