“But know that the Lord has set apart the godly man for Himself; The Lord hears when I call to Him.” Psalm 4:3
Angie and I were recently counseling Josh and Kristi. Kristi had been a Christ-follower for a long time and possessed a strong knowledge of God’s Word. Josh was a relatively new believer. Young in his faith, Josh was surprised to find out that he was called to be the spiritual leader in their relationship. He was willing to take on the duty, but asked, “What does it look like to be the spiritual leader?” I totally empathized with Josh. Angie was more spiritually mature when we got married. As men, we are often told to be the spiritual leader, but we don’t even know where to begin. In order to help Josh navigate his journey, I put together the following call to action:
- Create a discipline of scheduled prayer – I happen to pray each morning in the shower. I’ve picked shower time because it is something I do every day. It doesn’t matter when you pray; it only matters that you create a habit of prayer.
- Pray randomly throughout your day – Your scheduled prayer time shouldn’t be the only time you pray. Regularly pray for the events of your day. I often pray before meetings, mentoring sessions, and time with friends or family.
- Create a discipline of scheduled prayer time as a couple/family – Have a set time at least once a week when you come together as a couple or family for prayer. Angie and I meet for 20 minutes to pray as a couple before we leave for church on Sunday. When our kids still lived at home, we met together as a family to pray before church. Some couples pray together more often, such as in bed together every night. Asking your wife if you can pray with and for her at the end of the day can be some of the best foreplay.
- Randomly pray together as a couple – In addition to praying at scheduled times, pray spontaneously as a couple for special events and situations. Remember: prayer can be anywhere, even in a car or an elevator.
- Attend church together as a couple – As the spiritual leader of your home, make attending church as a family a top priority every week. As you sit together in church, gently reach over and take your wife’s hand in yours.
- Read your Bible – The Bible is God’s love letter to us. The more time you spend in God’s Word, the better you will comprehend what it means to be a godly man. You will be in tune with God’s will for your own and your family’s lives. Today’s technology allows you to read or listen to the Bible on your smartphone or computer. You can always have the Bible at your fingertips.
- Give to God of your time, talents, and treasures – The more you grow in your relationship with Christ, the more you will come to understand that everything you are, and everything you have, has come from above. A great way to thank God for all He has done is to give of your time and talents by getting involved in a ministry. When Angie and I originally got involved in the premarital counseling ministry, we did so in order to give back to God. Little did we know that God was going to pour out more blessings on us! Always remember: your first ministry is to your wife and kids. In Malachi 3:10, God asks us to test Him in our giving. He promises to open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it all.
- Make godly decisions – The decisions and choices we make in life should reflect our Christian values. Whenever you have a big decision, pray about it, see what the Bible has to say, listen carefully to your wife’s input, seek the counsel of Christian mentors, and then make the wisest decision you can that aligns with the knowledge you have gathered.
- Love God – God’s greatest commandment is to love Him with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Challenge yourself to make God the Lord of every part of your life.
- Love Others – God’s second greatest commandment is to love others. Let your life model your love for others in all that you say and do.
If you want to take your marriage to the next level, visit our website at www.marriagebygod.com
Ed and Angie Wright
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