What to do When You Have Stinkin’ Thinkin’ Towards Your Spouse

It is so easy to get caught up in stinkin’ thinkin’. Our spouse says or does something that is displeasing to us and we find that is all we can think about throughout the day. In fact, it has us dwelling on every time he or she has done something like that before. We find ourself more and more angry, hurt or frustrated. Poet, John Milton wrote,

The mind is its own place, and itself can make a heav’n of hell and a hell of a heaven.

Choose wisely what you decide to focus on. The Bible tells us

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ~ Phil. 4:8.

We are all sinners in need of forgiveness. We will all disappoint one another at sometime. None of us wants to be judged by our worst moment. We all need to give and receive grace. If you struggle with extending grace and forgiveness to your spouse, meditate on all that God has forgiven you and what it cost Him.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8

God demonstrated His love for us through forgiveness. He wants us to forgive others as an act of love for Him and others. We forgive out of obedience to God:

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14 -15
Loving like Jesus is a choice, not a feeling. When you struggle to forgive, make it between you and God, not between you and your spouse. Turn your heart over to God. Trust God to complete the good work He has begun in you.